Rough week. I’ll summarize it quickly. We had very little success, had to drop many investigators, and didn’t have much success in finding many more. Conference is saving me with spiritual hope for right now.
My companion only has two transfers left after this one and is beating himself up. He compares himself excessively and without recognizing it to other successful missionaries. He doesn’t quite feel like a failure, but feels like there’s more he could have done. Like there’s more he should be able to do. We’re in the work of dealing with people’s agency, and it can be very upsetting and frustrating at times, but I worry he relies too much on himself and too little on the Lord and his atonement. It hurts me to see him beat himself up like he does. It doesn’t help that his girlfriend wrote him a little while back letting him know she might be getting married. It gives him too many questions and I need his help to focus more on the people of Clorinda. I love the guy. I don’t know what to do to help him.
I feel lost. Personally, I know how to take care of myself just fine now. I have had many spiritual confirmations and am being guided exclusively by the spirit now. I love it. The story President Monson related of the man who he felt needed to speak in the temple struck me powerfully. I have had a number of similar experiences like that already in the mission. They keep coming. I finally know how to recognize the spirit, I know how to follow it, and I finally have the courage to act on the impressions it gives me. I don’t know how to help others recognize it is my only problem now.
I feel the Lord is preparing me for a great work. I don’t know where, when, why, or how, but I feel he is preparing me. So many of the talks in conference spoke perfectly to me. Just as I needed to hear them. I was privileged to watch all of the sessions and it was fantastic. My only complaint is that it has to end so quickly.
I feel like I know the apostles and prophet personally. I feel like I am as certain of the things I am proclaiming daily as they are. I also feel that as I have been working on my personal relationship with my Father in Heaven, I am growing closer to having the close bond that President Monson said we should develop. It’ incredible to see that in the past six months, the Spirit has prompted me and helped me to touch up in every area that the prophet and apostles mentioned. I know God speaks to me. Angels speak by the power of the Holy Ghost. They speak the words of Christ. We must be examples of the believers.
Follow their prophetic counsel. It is the word of God.
Christ lives. His Father as well. They love us. I know they love me. I feel very overwhelmed by my responsibilities right now, but they will help me pull through. I’m sure of it.
You are all in my prayers.
I am, as ever, your never deviating friend.
Elder Steven Reid Walker
This past weekend, members and friends of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints gathered in Salt Lake City and around the world via television, satellite, and the internet to watch our church leaders speak and bear testimony of the truthfulness of the gospel. If you are interested in reading or watching any of their messages, I invite you to visit lds.org and click on “General Conference.”
Also, this month is Steven’s birthday and he will be a whopping 20-year-old! His birthday is October 28th and if you feel so inclined to send him a card, below is the address of his mission home. Can’t be sure he’ll get it on time, but it’s the thought that counts. I bought the 98 cent stamps that have a little airplane on them…hope that helps! I dearly appreciate you following this blog and hope it inspires you in some way…As a mother, I thank you too, for your good thoughts and prayers in his behalf. It means the world to me! xoxo, Marsi
Elder Steven Walker
Misión Argentina Resistencia
Entre Rios 435
3500 Resistencia, Chaco